Category:The Genius Files

. Twin 12-year-olds Coke and Pepsi McDonald on their cross-county vacation.

Before then, they'll jump off a cliff, and get trapped in the locked basement of their burning school. The precocious brother and sister uncover a secret government plot to use “YAGs,” or Young American Geniuses, to solve the complex problems of the nation, and find that they are on the list. Suddenly, their 3,000-mile road trip becomes a lot more exciting because they'll be chased cross-country by murderous lunatics, left for dead in the pit of a sand dune, forced to decipher mysterious coded messages, thrown into a giant vat of SPAM, and visit the world's largest. . . ball of twine! The twins will nearly be boiled alivem in a huge basket of french fries, frozen to death by soft-serve ice cream, stampeded in a wild stadium riot, kidnapped from a high-speed roller coaster, and worst of all their parents think they're totally joking! The McDonalds’ trek across the U.S. includes stops at the Donner Party Memorial, and the museum of PEZ memorabilia, all while being pursued by dangerous “dudes with bowler hats”, Although the interjection of factual information from their college-professor father is a bit forced at times.

There's more, but if we told you here, we'd STILL have to kill you.